Feeling crippled

The past always plays a part of our future. We can feel the emotion of every motivational quote that says that leaving the past behind and move forward, but those words and pretty pictures will not change the fact that you have a past that makes up everything you are today.

It is true that we shouldn’t allow the past to define our future maybe, but the past is your biggest most formidable tool you have to shape the future, why would you not want to access the true power of that tool? If this tool is missused however, it can be the crippling tool that allows you only to live in the past and that can be oh so detrimental to your future. The past is not something that can be buried, sometimes we think we can will it into submission or possibly forget it, sweep it under a rug or lock it up, but the truth is, we can not. It is the essence of what we are, it is the decisions we make, it is our judgment of others or even ourselves. It is the pathway in the brain that leads to every reaction we have to anything. The cool thing about the past, is it isn’t the future. Just a tool to wield our desires and successes of the future.

The past is a very strong building block. How can we use it to shore up the future? There is so much that we hang onto that we shouldn’t and so much that we should hang onto that we don’t. It is our fears of repeating mistakes and pride in our successes that weaken our ability to see clearly. Everyone has heard the saying that “the grass isn’t always greener” possibly ” everyone has struggles”. It is when we hear these words, we usually react in a manner of disbelief. This reaction is a selfish, self defense thought. Are we to feel sorry for the man with no worries of money? Are we easily drawn to the conclusion that the “perfect family on the corner does not have pain or suffering?”

Why, of course we do! It is only natural, for our own sanity to assume we have it worse and that no one knows how you feel about your defeats, your losses, your struggles. It is a natural chemical reaction in the brain to draw up the pain from past challenges. It is an animal instinct. Our brains are gentically designed to remember the emotion and sensation of everything we experience.These are the eletronic notes that we refer to the next time something makes us feel them again. As a matter of fact, they are the reason you feel them again. They are the past, electronically etched into live tissue. They are ready at all times to react to pain, loss, dissapointment, sadness. But hey, they are also at the ready everytime we feel joy, surprise, happiness, pride, contentment, humility, comfort, pleasure and elation.

The question is now, why is it so easy to access sadness, dispair, anger, loss, disappoinment more so than joy and elation? Well, it’s because we more often access our emotion tied to embarresment. We don’t want others to know of our mistakes and bad choices, so we build a pathway in the brain directly to the negative sensation of dishonesty. Yep, I am calling hiding our past a dishonest act. It’s not the fact that we don’t share it with others, it’s the reality that we don’t share it with ourselves. We don’t appreciate every mistake and blunder that we’ve made for what it is…. we tuck it away in a corner, electronically live wired into a corner,ready to shed doubt on any thought that passes by. ZING!. We feel all the emotions tied to that thing from the past, sadness, shame, whatever it was. Then we dig that deeper hole and the electronic field, well it gets bigger, easier to come in connect with. Damn it!

Now realize, I’m speaking in fairly lamen terms, I’m using words that evoke an emotion I would like to tie to this post. the technically anotomical and physiological description would drive us all to drinking, but in a SENSE, this works.

What emotion did you feel when I called us all dishonest? Did you get defensive? Did you feel like withdrawing or possibly feel aggresive? Did you agree with me and think to yourself that yes, you know people just like that? Did you feel shame? Whatever thought you had was derived from the corner you pack all your hidden past in. That is the nature of the brain. The coolest thing about all of this, is becoming cognizant of the reactions we have to what happens around us, the people around us! By being aware and then focusing on what brought on the emotion attached to it, we can then attach it to something from our past! THEN, if that isn’t exciting enough, we can look at what the past shows us and we can now start to appreciate the role it plays, the opportunity for growth it offers and we can consciously use it as a stepping stone for the future! This is very exciting! Just understanding that we can change the pathway and embrace our past to evolve into a better place and happier place in the future! Can we attach positive emotions to the things we have buried from our past? Yes! Embrace and love everything from the past, because it is these experiences that provide the foundation and powerful beauty that lies ahead.

Have a beautiful day and embrace yourself as you are.

Nikki

Trust the work

Yoga isn’t the only thing that can bring life into focus. As a matter of fact, yoga can’t do anything unless you surrender yourself to the work. Unless you surrender yourself to trusiting the feelings you get with your practice, just as it is with practicing anything in life.

What do you practice everyday that brings your life into focus. If you can’t think of anything, maybe it’s time to reevaluate your time. Do you think you don’t have the time? Is your schedule so full that you think you can’t fit one more thing in? When I mention the idea of adding something valuable for your wellbeing to your schedule, does the thought occur “yeah, right, like I can add something else to my schedule, right, I can take time for me everyday, Ha!” or ” It’s a novel Idea, but the reality is, it isn’t going to happen, I’m to busy doing what has to be done!”

I am going to ask you to take a normal busy day, and try some exercises throughout the day. If you have to write yourself notes and leave them everywhere you go throughout your day as a reminder, that may be the thing that helps you. Maybe set reminders on your phone. Maybe get creative with a way to remind yourself, because I’m telling you, in the beginning of creating the right process and time for your own health and well being, isn’t as easy to remember as onemight think. Over time, yes, but not at first. Find what kind of reminding system works for you and for 1 day, get though this challenge I bring to you.

Our goal here is to remove negative thoughts and/or behaviors that waste time that could be spent creating your true capacity of happiness and wellness. What if you could get to the end of each day accomplishing all of your tasks set before you and feel refreshed and successful instead of exhausted and possible frustrated?

I challenge you, just for a day to take a moment every hour, you can be driving, walking, running, working, watching your childs game, doing the dishes, taking a shower or even sitting on the toilet. Whatever it is, the task doesn’t matter. What matters is to check in with your thoughts. Where are they? Are they on the task at hand? Are you regretting something? Are you thinking about someone else, somewhere else? Check in with your thoughts. Once you check in, ask yourself if this thought process is working for you. Is this a negative or possitive thought? Is what your thinking helping or hindering your emotional state? Is it reducing or increasing stress? Then, just for a moment, think of what you want. Think of a favorite quote, think of something beautiful, think of something funny, think of someone who has influenced you to be better, maybe just focus on the task at hand and bring your breath and full attention to it. Then move on…. Check in again during the next hour. Once your day has finished, check in with yourself when you go to bed. Pay attention to how you feel, how your body feels, how your heart feels. Then start again the next day.

This may sound small and insignificant but this is where TRUST comes into play. Trust the work. Trust that with patience, the significant results will happen over time and may not be the 1st day or even the 1st week. But I promise, if you trust this simple work that you will reap the rewards. Our society makes it easy to put away our needs and stable supports of self. The pressures we bow to are seemingly innocent and worm their way into our thoughts, our actions and our days. They come and go, the days, and somehow another year has passed and we have missed the simple pleasures of time. Be responsible to yourself 1st and your abilities to your tasks and to others with grow expenetially.

Start with this one small challenge. Let the evolution of your growth be the motivator for the next challenge. Get strong and able with the task of changing and guiding your thoughts to better your day and so much around you will seem easier and more usefull. Your ability to perform will increase. Your body will start dealing with stress better, your heart will find more joy and more beauty in the world around you. Trust the work. Trust that the evolution will happen. Learn patience and self love through the process.

Only after injecting these possitive or beautiful thoughts into your day, will you discover how much time you really have. we feel like our days are not our own to control, that our tasks control our time. But, trust the work. Shift your thoughts, one at a time. Find your own way. Listen to yourself and the cues you receive. Be cognizant of yourself, your thoughts, your actions. This doesn’t mean that every day will be stress free, pain free or struggle free. It just gives you the tools to see more of what’s happening and more options to make it better, or even just the patience to make it through having survived the freaking day!

Set your intent and be attentive. For now, try for once an hour, find a reminder system that works for you. Soon , “you can work your way to the grill”(meaning, you will start being able to be cognizant more often, with less effort) “and that’s when the big bucks start rollin in” (meaning that you will reap more rewards more often). I am also glad that I could work a movie quote from Coming to America into my Blog….

If you get a chance during your trust the work exercise, check in with me. Check in here and let me know how you are doing, let me know if you need suggestions or if you have any, it would be great to collaborate!

be cognizant and find your thoughts with you.

Have a beautiful day!

Nikki

#healthandwellness #bewell #cognizantreconstruction #trustthework #findyou #retreat #itistime

Courage

When we touch on the subject of challenges, the first word I think of is Courage. Not that we need courage to face challenges necessarily, but that courage is what we are given when we work through the challenge and step forward. Courage is like a muscle, if we exercise it, it gets stronger (Ruth Gordan). So as we overcome or even give into challenges, we are exercising courage. If we can become aware of this accomplishment, we become more cognizant of the power we hold within our heart and mind. I like the idea that to exercise courage, I need only to look forward to each challenge as a workout session! It allows me to not be afraid or negative about the next broken windshield or leaking roof, or the next loss. As each challenge exposes itself, I have the opportunity to be excited about what’s to come. Excited about what will enrich my life next, excited about the opportunity to find something else out about myself. This brings me to my next favorite word in the series and that is Action! In the book, The richest man in Babylon, on page 56, George Samuel Clason states that “Action will lead you forward to the successes thou doest desire”. I read this often enough that the page is worn. It means some much in some many different contexts.

First, even if we are not really desiring something specific, any action in any form, can lead us to our desires. And if we dream of something, if we want to create something, if we want to achieve something, it’s the action of the first step towards that goal that enlivens our courage and propels us forward.

And it doesn’t always have to be something big or a major life changes, sometimes it’s the really small moment that exercises our courage by action. This morning it was cold outside. My car was warm, i was in the parking lot of my favorite coffee shop…. “ugh, i dont want to go out in the cold”… But it’s coffee, so of course I’m going! I thought of my warm Americano with steamed heavy cream inside waiting for me, the endorphins hit my brain and I smiled all the way in, where I was greeted with happy faces and “good morning” s all around! I cracked a joke about the cold and such. As I bounced back to my car with a hot cup in my hand, I felt some good about the day. This, because I actively changed my perspective to one of happiness! That overcoming the cold, to say hello to beautiful people was much more powerful than any cold grey day could erase. Now, as I go through my day, I find joy in each moment that I think of that happiness and my day is awesome.

It may sound silly, but each action, big or small can make a difference somehow, each day, my environment is affected by me instead of my environment effecting me. I use courage as a catalyst for action and it always takes me somewhere better.

So today, join me and exercise your courage!